http://www.nyfa.org/level3.asp?id=377&fid=6&sid=17
Friday, January 29, 2010
Saturday, January 23, 2010
The end is just the Beginning
I am looking for the words to summarize the experience. I have found many new questions, which I will spend my near and distant future answering - and questioning. This experience has been so rich and I strongly feel that it was one of those 'meant to be things' Above all that I have learned - I am happiest to walk away knowing that this is the right path for me.
When looking for the volunteer opportunity, I was searching for any chance to see art therapy - I would have carried buckets of water from a well if someone was letting me simply observe their sessions! I was not looking for a particular patient population, although I have an idea of what population I want to specialize in - which is not what I was working with at FREE (MRDD and Autistic). What is so wonderful about working with a population that is not my ideal/goal population is that I know I can still be happy and believe in it! After graduate school I will most likely not be able to work with the population I want immediately. It will also take years before I can establish a private practice. This is so wonderful because it will allow me to explore this field - who it can help - how it can help -with what - and why!!
I am so eager to learn more! I want to read and question and research! I am hoping to find an opportunity to assist/volunteer/intern with an art therapist or art specialist - or even work in a community art group with the goal of healing or nurturing through art.
I feel so fulfilled - this experience has made me so happy! Everyday has been exciting and interesting. I finally feel like I am able to give back what I got. At the same time I have been rediscovering at! I have not drawn this much in at least a year - in fact I've always disliked drawing because I can't get what's in my head, out - on the paper - not the way I want it anyway. Drawing what I feel - what is inside my heart just comes right out! It pours out in bright purple and pink and green and blue! Having realized that artistically expressing myself can be done as purely emotional expression - without the academic mumbo-jumbo that I am hindered by in school - I will continue to draw at the end of each day - or right when I need to!
I am also Excited to cross the boundary and bring some of these pure expressions into my ceramic art! The expressive release won't be restricted here because it already exists on paper - its pure feeling can remain there, while existing in the ceramic work as well - but this art-making will just be a wonderful experience that I love and can't not do - but it doesn't have to be my outlet entirely! My outlet does will not be restricted by an assignment!
There is so much joy pulsing through me at the moment that it is hard to face the sad elephant in the room - the experience is coming to an end - but right now it just feels like just this experience is coming to an end and there are so many more waiting around the corner - this was just the beginning!
When looking for the volunteer opportunity, I was searching for any chance to see art therapy - I would have carried buckets of water from a well if someone was letting me simply observe their sessions! I was not looking for a particular patient population, although I have an idea of what population I want to specialize in - which is not what I was working with at FREE (MRDD and Autistic). What is so wonderful about working with a population that is not my ideal/goal population is that I know I can still be happy and believe in it! After graduate school I will most likely not be able to work with the population I want immediately. It will also take years before I can establish a private practice. This is so wonderful because it will allow me to explore this field - who it can help - how it can help -with what - and why!!
I am so eager to learn more! I want to read and question and research! I am hoping to find an opportunity to assist/volunteer/intern with an art therapist or art specialist - or even work in a community art group with the goal of healing or nurturing through art.
I feel so fulfilled - this experience has made me so happy! Everyday has been exciting and interesting. I finally feel like I am able to give back what I got. At the same time I have been rediscovering at! I have not drawn this much in at least a year - in fact I've always disliked drawing because I can't get what's in my head, out - on the paper - not the way I want it anyway. Drawing what I feel - what is inside my heart just comes right out! It pours out in bright purple and pink and green and blue! Having realized that artistically expressing myself can be done as purely emotional expression - without the academic mumbo-jumbo that I am hindered by in school - I will continue to draw at the end of each day - or right when I need to!
I am also Excited to cross the boundary and bring some of these pure expressions into my ceramic art! The expressive release won't be restricted here because it already exists on paper - its pure feeling can remain there, while existing in the ceramic work as well - but this art-making will just be a wonderful experience that I love and can't not do - but it doesn't have to be my outlet entirely! My outlet does will not be restricted by an assignment!
There is so much joy pulsing through me at the moment that it is hard to face the sad elephant in the room - the experience is coming to an end - but right now it just feels like just this experience is coming to an end and there are so many more waiting around the corner - this was just the beginning!
Thoughts on Completion
Following are my thoughts in images, regarding the end of my time shadowing art therapists.
Last Week | 1/20/10
Saying goodbye at the Islandia site (where we run a program with mentally impaired adults) was smoother than I'd expected. The clients did express that they would miss me verbally, as well as with gifts of art work - which I am very touched by. They did not express the sense of abandonment that I noted with the Fancy Free group in Farmingdale, or even the core group of autistic children. The clients at Islandia were often in a more stable mood than the other groups and were perhaps more able to handle the news of my departure.
During supervision today I had the chance to discuss the entire experience with my supervisor Ed Regensburg. I was thrilled to hear that he thought my enthusiasm, sophisticated questions and genuine interest in art therapy would make me a great candidate to study art therapy at the masters level. We were able to discuss m anxieties regarding departure, and he reminded me that most of these clients have experienced at least 100 different care givers and even family members coming in and out of their lives - not that it lessens the impact that I made, or how they will react to it - but just a reminder that they will react like they have with all these caregivers that came before me - so I cannot take to heart to seriously if they are anger or hurt at my departure. Ed reiterated that we announced my presence as one that would be temporary, and have been reminding the clients of this throughout my time there. He advised me to fully process how I felt about leaving to avoid any emotional break downs on my part while saying goodbye to the Fancy Free group and the Helping Hands group tomorrow.
Lauren joined our session towards the end and provided me with feedback as to how I had done. I was very happy to hear what she thought, as I hold a great respect for her as an art therapist. I truly enjoyed working by her side and learning from her. Lauren congratulated me for my enthusiasm, and dedication. She told me that she was impressed with my openness and ability to communicate with all the groups, something that is not easy or comfortable for many people. Lauren felt that I was able to follow her lead very well, while asserting myself and being an active presence in every group. She believe that I have a natural inclination for therapeutic work (whether I choose art therapy or not), and agreed with Ed that my questions and interest would make me a positive candidate in a graduate degree program. In terms of critical feedback (which is so important) Lauren noted that I would have benefited from deflecting personal questions from the clients, as it is suggested that you do not reveal too much personal information to the clients. She also explained that many of the clients attempted to latch onto me for extra attention. She was understanding and related to her past experience saying that it is easy to become involved in a conversation about how the client feel, or to ask "do you want to talk about it", but as art therapists, and especially with the particular client population we have (who are prone to behavioral and emotional outbursts) it is responsibility to contain the expression of these emotion in the artwork - and to allow that to serve as their outlet.
Lauren thanked me for my help over the last month and ensured me that it was going to be a hard transition to doing all the work alone. Lauren has been an amazing mentor. I am happy to have her as a contact in the world of art therapy!
I am so thankful to both Ed and Lauren and all the groups I worked with, for this truly fulfilling experience!
During supervision today I had the chance to discuss the entire experience with my supervisor Ed Regensburg. I was thrilled to hear that he thought my enthusiasm, sophisticated questions and genuine interest in art therapy would make me a great candidate to study art therapy at the masters level. We were able to discuss m anxieties regarding departure, and he reminded me that most of these clients have experienced at least 100 different care givers and even family members coming in and out of their lives - not that it lessens the impact that I made, or how they will react to it - but just a reminder that they will react like they have with all these caregivers that came before me - so I cannot take to heart to seriously if they are anger or hurt at my departure. Ed reiterated that we announced my presence as one that would be temporary, and have been reminding the clients of this throughout my time there. He advised me to fully process how I felt about leaving to avoid any emotional break downs on my part while saying goodbye to the Fancy Free group and the Helping Hands group tomorrow.
Lauren joined our session towards the end and provided me with feedback as to how I had done. I was very happy to hear what she thought, as I hold a great respect for her as an art therapist. I truly enjoyed working by her side and learning from her. Lauren congratulated me for my enthusiasm, and dedication. She told me that she was impressed with my openness and ability to communicate with all the groups, something that is not easy or comfortable for many people. Lauren felt that I was able to follow her lead very well, while asserting myself and being an active presence in every group. She believe that I have a natural inclination for therapeutic work (whether I choose art therapy or not), and agreed with Ed that my questions and interest would make me a positive candidate in a graduate degree program. In terms of critical feedback (which is so important) Lauren noted that I would have benefited from deflecting personal questions from the clients, as it is suggested that you do not reveal too much personal information to the clients. She also explained that many of the clients attempted to latch onto me for extra attention. She was understanding and related to her past experience saying that it is easy to become involved in a conversation about how the client feel, or to ask "do you want to talk about it", but as art therapists, and especially with the particular client population we have (who are prone to behavioral and emotional outbursts) it is responsibility to contain the expression of these emotion in the artwork - and to allow that to serve as their outlet.
Lauren thanked me for my help over the last month and ensured me that it was going to be a hard transition to doing all the work alone. Lauren has been an amazing mentor. I am happy to have her as a contact in the world of art therapy!
I am so thankful to both Ed and Lauren and all the groups I worked with, for this truly fulfilling experience!
Last Week | 1/19/10
I have spent the past week preparing myself and the clients for my departure. I am feeling a great loss at the completion of my times at FREE. What will be hardest is not helping others - not helping the clients I have gotten to know. When I told the Kids I was leaving, my heart broke a little when one client asked why, and when I was coming back. It was very moving especially considering the widely accepted notion that children with autism do not form emotional attachments.
I had an equally difficult time telling the Fancy Free group of mentally impaired adults. Being the most communicative group of all three core groups they were able to tell me directly that they were sad at my departure. Some clients expressed anger, others were strictly sad, still some seemed unaffected, but showed emotional loss in their artwork during this session
Despite telling the clients I would soon be leaving and that this was my last week, they were very upset today, making quite a hard day - very emotional. The clients are aware of my leaving and are upset about it. They feel like I am deserting them - those were the words of a client who has only been in one week of sessions with me! Another client was very downcast and emotional. She seemed incapable of moving past it - though I am not entirely sure it is related to my leaving.
I am feeling guilty about leaving - selfish to come into all these groups of people's lives when I can, and leave when I have to.
I am anxious to discuss how to handle the last day with each group on a professional level, keeping the client's feelings in mind and not my own. I will discuss this during supervision tomorrow.
I had an equally difficult time telling the Fancy Free group of mentally impaired adults. Being the most communicative group of all three core groups they were able to tell me directly that they were sad at my departure. Some clients expressed anger, others were strictly sad, still some seemed unaffected, but showed emotional loss in their artwork during this session
Despite telling the clients I would soon be leaving and that this was my last week, they were very upset today, making quite a hard day - very emotional. The clients are aware of my leaving and are upset about it. They feel like I am deserting them - those were the words of a client who has only been in one week of sessions with me! Another client was very downcast and emotional. She seemed incapable of moving past it - though I am not entirely sure it is related to my leaving.
I am feeling guilty about leaving - selfish to come into all these groups of people's lives when I can, and leave when I have to.
I am anxious to discuss how to handle the last day with each group on a professional level, keeping the client's feelings in mind and not my own. I will discuss this during supervision tomorrow.
Day 10 | 1/9/10
I was expecting the first Saturday program to be stressful and intense. Remembering my first meeting with my core group of autistic children, it was difficult to imagine meeting 5 new groups - ranging in age from approximately 3 - 17 years old. While the start of each session held an ounce ore more of initial anxiety, the groups were not overly stressful - in fact they all went very well - there were no major outbursts.
Spending the day with the different age groups reinforced the obvious, but easy to disregard, fact that autism is a life long difference. Yet there is some chance for improvement - behaviorally, emotionally, developmentally. I am lead to wonder whether each individual child with autism has the same potential for improvement..
Is there a possibility that the child can be cured of autism - and is that a possibility for all autistic children? If so, when would treatment need to begin - what would treatment entail?
These questions began to circulate as I took note of the different levels of affect. Some of the younger kids seemed more able, communicative, and aware than the older -supposedly- more developed children.
- So is autism something that gets worse as it progresses - with or without treatment?
I also had the chance to further note the many odd - and characteristic of the individual - behaviors. Some clients engage physically - holding hands (with myself or staff) - others search the rooms for particular objects - some spit, some scream, some pinch, some laugh. I was most affected by a teenage male client who took a napkin and balled it up - He tossed his head backwards and in one swift movement, shoved the napkin into the back of his throat. The napkin had to be removed by the staff before the client could swallow it. The staff was not as surprised as I was - as they were aware of his characteristic need to gag himself / inflict vomiting.
Each art therapy group was short - 1/2 hour. We began as usual by passing around a bean bag and introducing ourselves. We then reviewed the rules and demoed the activity for the day. As Lauren had been working with the circle/containment theme with the Saturday group as well - we introduced the plaster craft strips to further substantiate the border of the circle.
The pre-cut strips were dipped into a shallow bowl of water, often with guidance b myself or Lauren. After the excess water was squeezed away - which was done in varying ways depending on the client (some balling it up and squeezing it in the hand repeatedly until pasty, to gliding the fingers along the strip to squeegee the water off) - The clients rolled the strips into a long coil, and wrapped it along the circular outline which we provided. Some clients were able to smooth the plaster strips when they had completed the circle.
As was expected, there were various reactions by the clients to the plaster craft. Some clients outright refused to attempt the activity, some tried it at first and discontinued - complaining about the feeling of the plaster strips. Yet others very much enjoyed the feeling and the process. Individuals with autism are very affected by sensory stimulations. Texture/Touch being a very strong sense, the plaster craft was expected to be taken to or disliked depending on the individual.
Once the plaster activity was completed the children spent the remaining time coloring the regularly drawn circle or human figure, or free drawing. When the activity took the majority of the session, the children colored calmly - more calmly than they did, and with more focus than if the activity was quickly completed.
Art-ing about it :)
Spending the day with the different age groups reinforced the obvious, but easy to disregard, fact that autism is a life long difference. Yet there is some chance for improvement - behaviorally, emotionally, developmentally. I am lead to wonder whether each individual child with autism has the same potential for improvement..
Is there a possibility that the child can be cured of autism - and is that a possibility for all autistic children? If so, when would treatment need to begin - what would treatment entail?
These questions began to circulate as I took note of the different levels of affect. Some of the younger kids seemed more able, communicative, and aware than the older -supposedly- more developed children.
- So is autism something that gets worse as it progresses - with or without treatment?
I also had the chance to further note the many odd - and characteristic of the individual - behaviors. Some clients engage physically - holding hands (with myself or staff) - others search the rooms for particular objects - some spit, some scream, some pinch, some laugh. I was most affected by a teenage male client who took a napkin and balled it up - He tossed his head backwards and in one swift movement, shoved the napkin into the back of his throat. The napkin had to be removed by the staff before the client could swallow it. The staff was not as surprised as I was - as they were aware of his characteristic need to gag himself / inflict vomiting.
Each art therapy group was short - 1/2 hour. We began as usual by passing around a bean bag and introducing ourselves. We then reviewed the rules and demoed the activity for the day. As Lauren had been working with the circle/containment theme with the Saturday group as well - we introduced the plaster craft strips to further substantiate the border of the circle.
The pre-cut strips were dipped into a shallow bowl of water, often with guidance b myself or Lauren. After the excess water was squeezed away - which was done in varying ways depending on the client (some balling it up and squeezing it in the hand repeatedly until pasty, to gliding the fingers along the strip to squeegee the water off) - The clients rolled the strips into a long coil, and wrapped it along the circular outline which we provided. Some clients were able to smooth the plaster strips when they had completed the circle.
As was expected, there were various reactions by the clients to the plaster craft. Some clients outright refused to attempt the activity, some tried it at first and discontinued - complaining about the feeling of the plaster strips. Yet others very much enjoyed the feeling and the process. Individuals with autism are very affected by sensory stimulations. Texture/Touch being a very strong sense, the plaster craft was expected to be taken to or disliked depending on the individual.
Once the plaster activity was completed the children spent the remaining time coloring the regularly drawn circle or human figure, or free drawing. When the activity took the majority of the session, the children colored calmly - more calmly than they did, and with more focus than if the activity was quickly completed.
Art-ing about it :)
Day 9 | 1/6/2010 | Group 2
Our second group of the day was the Helping Hands group with autistic Children. We are currently working with two repeated 'containers' - or outlines in which we are gearing the children to color or draw in. One 'container' is a simple circle, composed of solid line, and the other is a human form, outlined in dashed lines. Lauren has been working with the circle for sometime, and we have recently made the circle more substantial by adding tissue paper boarders - and will be using plaster craft on Saturday.
Lauren and Ed have been working towards an exhibition dealing with chaos and containment. It was expected that the circle wold promote the containment of the artwork/emotions emitted, and that we would see a more chaotic expression with the human figures. For the most part, this expectation has been confirmed, for the most part.
In today's group we re-introduced tissue paper as a means of bordering the circles. One of the children, a female client had a major breakthrough! She surprised everyone with her artwork, bringing tears to the eyes of her one-on-one staff.
This particular client had been repeating the same steps continually. She would outline the circle or body, and then completely fill it in with one color. She would then proceed to make a border around the entire composition, following the format of the paper she was working on, and would then fill the entire page with the same color (often red).
Today the client made a significant jump using the tissue paper. Firstly, she approached the task in an entirely different way than her peers (by bunching pieces up into small balls and glueing them around the border of the circle). Secondly, she finally recognized the circle - allowing it to be [not filling it in] - and creating a figurative image!
The client began by placing the purple, bunched tissue paper around the border of the circle. Once finished with this she began to fill the circle in - starting from the top quarter and moving left to right. We had all assumed that the client would fill the entire circle with the tissue paper balls - but she stopped placing them at less than a quarter of the way full. Underneath the dense area, she glued two bunched dots spaced evenly apart. Below these dot in the center of the circle she place an upside-down curved line and then returned her concentration to the are above it, placing one small tissue paper bunch. It was unmistakably a sad face!
Deciding she was finished with this piece she proceeded to color a human form. Her breakthrough continued! While the client did fill the entire page, she did so with several colors, yellow, brown, and orange! The client who had previously only creating artwork using one color per piece was able to push herself to use more than one color!
As the two art therapist I have been assisting excitedly discussed this - they spoke of it representing her ability to deal with more than one emotion at a time. She has become comfortable enough to show her emotion and not hide it afterwords by covering it up entirely! - Her progress alone is enough to be considered for a case study - and she has more time to continue and progress farther!
This is what it is all about!!!!
Lauren and Ed have been working towards an exhibition dealing with chaos and containment. It was expected that the circle wold promote the containment of the artwork/emotions emitted, and that we would see a more chaotic expression with the human figures. For the most part, this expectation has been confirmed, for the most part.
In today's group we re-introduced tissue paper as a means of bordering the circles. One of the children, a female client had a major breakthrough! She surprised everyone with her artwork, bringing tears to the eyes of her one-on-one staff.
This particular client had been repeating the same steps continually. She would outline the circle or body, and then completely fill it in with one color. She would then proceed to make a border around the entire composition, following the format of the paper she was working on, and would then fill the entire page with the same color (often red).
Today the client made a significant jump using the tissue paper. Firstly, she approached the task in an entirely different way than her peers (by bunching pieces up into small balls and glueing them around the border of the circle). Secondly, she finally recognized the circle - allowing it to be [not filling it in] - and creating a figurative image!
The client began by placing the purple, bunched tissue paper around the border of the circle. Once finished with this she began to fill the circle in - starting from the top quarter and moving left to right. We had all assumed that the client would fill the entire circle with the tissue paper balls - but she stopped placing them at less than a quarter of the way full. Underneath the dense area, she glued two bunched dots spaced evenly apart. Below these dot in the center of the circle she place an upside-down curved line and then returned her concentration to the are above it, placing one small tissue paper bunch. It was unmistakably a sad face!
Deciding she was finished with this piece she proceeded to color a human form. Her breakthrough continued! While the client did fill the entire page, she did so with several colors, yellow, brown, and orange! The client who had previously only creating artwork using one color per piece was able to push herself to use more than one color!
As the two art therapist I have been assisting excitedly discussed this - they spoke of it representing her ability to deal with more than one emotion at a time. She has become comfortable enough to show her emotion and not hide it afterwords by covering it up entirely! - Her progress alone is enough to be considered for a case study - and she has more time to continue and progress farther!
This is what it is all about!!!!
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Day 9 | 1/6/2010
At our morning Day Rehabilitation session in Islandia, Lauren put in motion her desire for a more organized and easy to structure group. Our first step in doing this was setting down the new rules of what is needed and expected of the group members. Top on the list is that we keep all of the artwork created in the session. The work will be returned (excepting those pieces withheld for exhibition purposes) during our portfolio reviews, which will occur every three months. The group members will not be creating cards or presents for others in or art therapy session. Lauren created sign up sheets for our Monday sessions as well as our Wednesday sessions. The clients were encouraged and welcomed to joining both groups, but it was made very clear that the sign up for the group meant that they were making a commitment to eh group which in tailed regular attendance, full sessions [ with close attention and full participation], and complying with the rules.
The clients seemed only unhappy about not being able to make presents for others
Following the introduction of the new rules, we had a very comfortable session. The group was not too large, and the space was clear of other clients. There was a low stress atmosphere and after giving giving the run down of the New Year's structure, the clients had the opportunity to draw.
For the majority of my time with the Islandia group, a female client has been drawing hearts. The client is quiet - she has a hard time finding the words - and a voice to tell us what she wants. She moves slowly, and works slowly and carefully. The client shows that she is self conscious of her work - she asks for help - often for me to draw a heart for her - or make a stencil.
[Following Lauren's lead, I have used this method of drawing something for two of the consumers to trace - each have asked for specific drawings. Regarding the Idea that art therapy is only productive through the spontaneous and original creation of artwork/images by the patient (a topic that was discussed indepthly during my supervision period with the director of the art therapy department Ed Regensburg) - I now have mixed feelings. While I see the logic - and agree with this notion set forth by Margeret Naumberg in the book Dynamically Oriented Art Therapy, and held by Ed, I wonder... if the consumer is telling/showing us a certain images tat they want to create, and are happy when they are able to trace our drawing of it (and quite unhappy when they are not) - Is it not really serving as a therapeutic release? - and how far from spontaneous is it really - when after-all it was the client, not the therapist, who decided on the imagery and subject - and for their own reasons]
This particular client is most likely capable of drawing a heart - but not he way she wants it to look. She complains even while tracing, that her hand shakes and asks that you trace it for her. I have once traced with her - she holding the pen, and me lightly guiding her hand.
The client has taken one template, (by template I mean a picture of hearts drawn by the art therapist Lauren, which the client uses to trace) and created several variants from it. At first she traced a few pages of the exact template. Today the client used the template - but only traced certain hearts in certain places - repeating or omitting at her own will and creating her own design. The client left all the drawings as mere outlines until prompted to color them in. She began using only two colors (pink and blue), but used up to four colors i her last drawing.
Reflecting and questioning:
- If the patient is using a stencil/non-original to create their own design - is it not spontaneous in some respects?
- How possible/plausible is it for anyone to develop a completely spontaneous image when we / they are bombarded with visual imagery on a daily basis?
- If the mind latches on to an image that is often repeated in the clients artwork, is it not significant (regardless of the level of 'spontaneity')?
- [Within the MRDD population specifically] Is the possibility of an image/object being on with sentimental value - or a bridge to a sentiment...
* Plausible?
* Of interest?
* Therapeutic?
The clients seemed only unhappy about not being able to make presents for others
Following the introduction of the new rules, we had a very comfortable session. The group was not too large, and the space was clear of other clients. There was a low stress atmosphere and after giving giving the run down of the New Year's structure, the clients had the opportunity to draw.
For the majority of my time with the Islandia group, a female client has been drawing hearts. The client is quiet - she has a hard time finding the words - and a voice to tell us what she wants. She moves slowly, and works slowly and carefully. The client shows that she is self conscious of her work - she asks for help - often for me to draw a heart for her - or make a stencil.
[Following Lauren's lead, I have used this method of drawing something for two of the consumers to trace - each have asked for specific drawings. Regarding the Idea that art therapy is only productive through the spontaneous and original creation of artwork/images by the patient (a topic that was discussed indepthly during my supervision period with the director of the art therapy department Ed Regensburg) - I now have mixed feelings. While I see the logic - and agree with this notion set forth by Margeret Naumberg in the book Dynamically Oriented Art Therapy, and held by Ed, I wonder... if the consumer is telling/showing us a certain images tat they want to create, and are happy when they are able to trace our drawing of it (and quite unhappy when they are not) - Is it not really serving as a therapeutic release? - and how far from spontaneous is it really - when after-all it was the client, not the therapist, who decided on the imagery and subject - and for their own reasons]
This particular client is most likely capable of drawing a heart - but not he way she wants it to look. She complains even while tracing, that her hand shakes and asks that you trace it for her. I have once traced with her - she holding the pen, and me lightly guiding her hand.
The client has taken one template, (by template I mean a picture of hearts drawn by the art therapist Lauren, which the client uses to trace) and created several variants from it. At first she traced a few pages of the exact template. Today the client used the template - but only traced certain hearts in certain places - repeating or omitting at her own will and creating her own design. The client left all the drawings as mere outlines until prompted to color them in. She began using only two colors (pink and blue), but used up to four colors i her last drawing.
Reflecting and questioning:
- If the patient is using a stencil/non-original to create their own design - is it not spontaneous in some respects?
- How possible/plausible is it for anyone to develop a completely spontaneous image when we / they are bombarded with visual imagery on a daily basis?
- If the mind latches on to an image that is often repeated in the clients artwork, is it not significant (regardless of the level of 'spontaneity')?
- [Within the MRDD population specifically] Is the possibility of an image/object being on with sentimental value - or a bridge to a sentiment...
* Plausible?
* Of interest?
* Therapeutic?
Day 8 | 1/5/2010
Our session with the Fancy Free group (which consists of mentally impaired/disabled adults, was similar to the last couple of sessions with he Islandia based groups, involving portfolio reviews. The clients were excited to review their work, as well as the work of their peers, but were anxious to create art work 0 a good sign - but a reminder, or nag at my recent questions regarding the discussion of the art work as a therapeutic aspect of the process.
The clients were all positive in terms of the discussion of the art works. Once again it was immensely fulfilling to witness the sense of accomplishment even the surprise at their own artistic success. On the flip side, the group did have an increasingly difficult time focusing - some members went off in their own conversations that were unrelated to the review of art work. I wonder if there would be more to discuss and read into if the at work was reviewed one on one with the therapist and client - although it would be extremely difficult in our particular sessions...
I imagine that creating a greater notion of self worth in the clients [something that I think is a particular goal with our fancy free group] is part of the goal in our art therapy sessions. In this regard I think the portfolio review was very successful. It serves as a major reinforcer to the weekly steps towards building confidence and self worth in the clients lives and minds and spirits. Each client was taken aback by the amount of work they had created individually, as well as by the success of each piece.
The energy in the room was slightly heightened by the emmittance of a a less than positive vibe. It was brought forth in a client that has recently lost her mother. The client became very emotional - with seemingly no trigger at all. Several minutes after responding to the question of where she had gotten a bottled water (asked by her staff), the client shouted "I'm sorry I was a bad girl! I'm sorry I was a bad girl!". She began grinding her teeth loudly and rubbing her hands together anxiously.
The outburst took a toll on the group (everyone came to a pause with our attention on this particular clients). The staff members were able to calm her down shortly after, but the client was sensitive [and insensitive to others] for the remainder of our session. The client interrupted others or deflected conversations and praise of her peer's to herself. The client continually mentioned the loss of her mother, and it was my instinctive reaction to discuss it with her. However it had been decided by her behavioral staff that she was only supposed to speak about her loss in a structured one-on-one environment because of her behavioral and emotional threshold. Lauren was able to redirect this behavior by focusing her attention into the artwork and process.
Reflections and questions:
So far I have not seen this client express the emotion connected to the loss of her mother in her art. I would like to gear her in that direction... but am not sure how... would she understand if I told her to draw how she felt?
- Are my expectations of 'drawing how you feel' hindering me from seeing that she may be doing this in her own way?
- How can you gear a clients to make expressive art V.S. drawing/craft?
- Is all art not expressive on at least some level?
The clients were all positive in terms of the discussion of the art works. Once again it was immensely fulfilling to witness the sense of accomplishment even the surprise at their own artistic success. On the flip side, the group did have an increasingly difficult time focusing - some members went off in their own conversations that were unrelated to the review of art work. I wonder if there would be more to discuss and read into if the at work was reviewed one on one with the therapist and client - although it would be extremely difficult in our particular sessions...
I imagine that creating a greater notion of self worth in the clients [something that I think is a particular goal with our fancy free group] is part of the goal in our art therapy sessions. In this regard I think the portfolio review was very successful. It serves as a major reinforcer to the weekly steps towards building confidence and self worth in the clients lives and minds and spirits. Each client was taken aback by the amount of work they had created individually, as well as by the success of each piece.
The energy in the room was slightly heightened by the emmittance of a a less than positive vibe. It was brought forth in a client that has recently lost her mother. The client became very emotional - with seemingly no trigger at all. Several minutes after responding to the question of where she had gotten a bottled water (asked by her staff), the client shouted "I'm sorry I was a bad girl! I'm sorry I was a bad girl!". She began grinding her teeth loudly and rubbing her hands together anxiously.
The outburst took a toll on the group (everyone came to a pause with our attention on this particular clients). The staff members were able to calm her down shortly after, but the client was sensitive [and insensitive to others] for the remainder of our session. The client interrupted others or deflected conversations and praise of her peer's to herself. The client continually mentioned the loss of her mother, and it was my instinctive reaction to discuss it with her. However it had been decided by her behavioral staff that she was only supposed to speak about her loss in a structured one-on-one environment because of her behavioral and emotional threshold. Lauren was able to redirect this behavior by focusing her attention into the artwork and process.
Reflections and questions:
So far I have not seen this client express the emotion connected to the loss of her mother in her art. I would like to gear her in that direction... but am not sure how... would she understand if I told her to draw how she felt?
- Are my expectations of 'drawing how you feel' hindering me from seeing that she may be doing this in her own way?
- How can you gear a clients to make expressive art V.S. drawing/craft?
- Is all art not expressive on at least some level?
Day 7 | 1/4/2010
Lauren and I met with our afternoon group at the Islandia Day Habilitation center, which is larger than the morning group. We continued with the portfolio review. We had the majority of the overall group members with us, as well as the crowded environment of extras, on-seers, and drifters. There were also members with less commitment, as they had already had the experience of reviewing, and their work was not included in this session.
While there was still no discussion regarding the meaning or feelings involved - It was rewarding to see the accomplished looks on each of the clients faces as the array of art work was laid before them. There were very brief discussion regarding the progress of the technical development - the progression from very simple to more complex, involving the combination of elements that had been repeated almost obsessively, but always separately in the initial stages. Taking a detailed notice of this progression, in this population especially, shows a mental development or advancement! This is verified by the science of child development, and the meaning of children's art at certain developmental stages. - I will be spending as much personal time studying these phenomenon's as possible as they are imperative to knowing about your client and their developmental stage.
Many of the questions from my last entry are still zig - zaging through my mind, with the addition of new ones:
- If we are able to push the clients to talk about emotions behind or derived from the work - will it be too much for these particular clients to experience consciously - in terms of their emotional and behavioral states?
- Is our role [for these particular populations/clients] as art therapist simply to allow the expression via art - to help cushion the emotional response or to protect the clients in a sense from the emotional overload that may occur through other forms of expression/therapy?
With the new year, our schedule has returned to a normal schedule of programs, uninterrupted by holidays. We had our regularly scheduled second group of the day which is the after school Helping Hands respite program for children with autism.
A new element was introduced to the children in the program, and followed by the more well known activity - the use of the circle as a possible containing force. The new element was the introduction of a human figure, rendered in dashed lines. It was expect that the children would react to the human figure with a more chaotic artist response - allowing their drawings to overcome the outline of the figure - or disregard it completely. It was expected that the circle would serve as a familiar activity - more calming and allowing for a greater level of concentration --> which would allow the children to continue with the geared task of containing their drawings within the circle - as Lauren has been working towards with the kids for at least a month.
The session itself had high energy. A client who was new to me was an extreme handful - on the move - obsessively searching for magazines [with perceived] potential for a violent outburst. The client's energy was apparent in the room and I feel that it intensified the energy of some of the others - That is not to say that some of the other clients do not have naturally intense energies already.
Our session did not run its full course. Often, the clients are able to do two drawings [more or less] - and are then at a stand still - they either do not want to draw anymore or are distracted by other simulations or are disengaged. It is extremely difficult to prompt each clients to continue or give further instructions when the session is in full swing.
It seemed that Lauren's assumption that the circle would be less chaotic was correct - but non of the circles actually contained the markings. The whole session felt chaotic - rather uncontained if I can use our own metaphors.
The session with the autistic children is very taxing when you have the chance to process everything that has been said, shouted, drawn and done. When I put real afterthought into the experience, there is much more than a loud nonsensical high energy... and that is what is so hard to figure out and carry with you.
Art-ing about it :?
While there was still no discussion regarding the meaning or feelings involved - It was rewarding to see the accomplished looks on each of the clients faces as the array of art work was laid before them. There were very brief discussion regarding the progress of the technical development - the progression from very simple to more complex, involving the combination of elements that had been repeated almost obsessively, but always separately in the initial stages. Taking a detailed notice of this progression, in this population especially, shows a mental development or advancement! This is verified by the science of child development, and the meaning of children's art at certain developmental stages. - I will be spending as much personal time studying these phenomenon's as possible as they are imperative to knowing about your client and their developmental stage.
Many of the questions from my last entry are still zig - zaging through my mind, with the addition of new ones:
- If we are able to push the clients to talk about emotions behind or derived from the work - will it be too much for these particular clients to experience consciously - in terms of their emotional and behavioral states?
- Is our role [for these particular populations/clients] as art therapist simply to allow the expression via art - to help cushion the emotional response or to protect the clients in a sense from the emotional overload that may occur through other forms of expression/therapy?
With the new year, our schedule has returned to a normal schedule of programs, uninterrupted by holidays. We had our regularly scheduled second group of the day which is the after school Helping Hands respite program for children with autism.
A new element was introduced to the children in the program, and followed by the more well known activity - the use of the circle as a possible containing force. The new element was the introduction of a human figure, rendered in dashed lines. It was expect that the children would react to the human figure with a more chaotic artist response - allowing their drawings to overcome the outline of the figure - or disregard it completely. It was expected that the circle would serve as a familiar activity - more calming and allowing for a greater level of concentration --> which would allow the children to continue with the geared task of containing their drawings within the circle - as Lauren has been working towards with the kids for at least a month.
The session itself had high energy. A client who was new to me was an extreme handful - on the move - obsessively searching for magazines [with perceived] potential for a violent outburst. The client's energy was apparent in the room and I feel that it intensified the energy of some of the others - That is not to say that some of the other clients do not have naturally intense energies already.
Our session did not run its full course. Often, the clients are able to do two drawings [more or less] - and are then at a stand still - they either do not want to draw anymore or are distracted by other simulations or are disengaged. It is extremely difficult to prompt each clients to continue or give further instructions when the session is in full swing.
It seemed that Lauren's assumption that the circle would be less chaotic was correct - but non of the circles actually contained the markings. The whole session felt chaotic - rather uncontained if I can use our own metaphors.
The session with the autistic children is very taxing when you have the chance to process everything that has been said, shouted, drawn and done. When I put real afterthought into the experience, there is much more than a loud nonsensical high energy... and that is what is so hard to figure out and carry with you.
Art-ing about it :?
Day 6 | 12/30/2009
This morning, the atmosphere at the Islandia based site, where we run our art therapy group with mentally impaired or disabled adults, was much more low key than our regular 12:30 sessions have been. Our group was no more than five clients and the room was more or less empty except for the art therapy group. The clients that were involved were much more engaged and focused - I sensed a higher level of relaxation - I also felt more relaxed. The lack of background noise and distractions seemed highly beneficial to the progress and participation of the group members in the art therapy session. The afternoon group, which is larger would really benefit from a private space where only art therapy was going on!
We spent our session closing the door on 2009, by celebrating the work that the clients had created in art therapy during their time with the art therapist, Lauren Fabrizio. We reviewed work that took place over a time span of approximately 4 months. Many of the clients had a great deal of work, and found it very exciting to display and review their work.
The clients were able to point to their favorite piece(s) and decide what processes they enjoyed working with the most. Sometimes, and mostly regarding figurative art, the clients chose favorite pieces and remembered what the theme/assignment was. There as however, no discussion as to how a certain artwork made each client feel - what emotions it derived or what thoughts the artist was projecting consciously/unconsciously. This makes me wonder if the clients themselves are aware of the weight of their artistic expression> Do they realize even that they are expressing an emotion, or telling us something about themselves through their art work? Then I get to thinking - does that matter? Is it important that they gain something through the art making process - BUT cant they can they gain something [other than confidence, self worth, purpose and developed technique] without discussion - without that recognition?
Further reflections and questions:
How can we get the clients (both mentally impaired and autistic - each having an extremely difficult time verbally expressing their wants, needs and feelings) to verbally discuss the meaning... that they may not see themselves... of their art?
- Should we expect the to verbalize the feeling projected through their art work?
- Do we need them to verbalize the feeling projected through their art work?
- How different are the answers to theses questions across different populations (ie more developed or verbal populations)
- Should the discussion of a client's art work and emotional status take place within the group - allowing other clients to comment on meanings, as well as the therapist or should the therapist and specific client discuss the meaning of the work privately?
In the end - does it do the client any good if the therapist is able to read into the artwork - but the client is not mentally capable of discussing it?
Phhheeewww - my mind is buzzing!
Art-ing about it :)
We spent our session closing the door on 2009, by celebrating the work that the clients had created in art therapy during their time with the art therapist, Lauren Fabrizio. We reviewed work that took place over a time span of approximately 4 months. Many of the clients had a great deal of work, and found it very exciting to display and review their work.
The clients were able to point to their favorite piece(s) and decide what processes they enjoyed working with the most. Sometimes, and mostly regarding figurative art, the clients chose favorite pieces and remembered what the theme/assignment was. There as however, no discussion as to how a certain artwork made each client feel - what emotions it derived or what thoughts the artist was projecting consciously/unconsciously. This makes me wonder if the clients themselves are aware of the weight of their artistic expression> Do they realize even that they are expressing an emotion, or telling us something about themselves through their art work? Then I get to thinking - does that matter? Is it important that they gain something through the art making process - BUT cant they can they gain something [other than confidence, self worth, purpose and developed technique] without discussion - without that recognition?
Further reflections and questions:
How can we get the clients (both mentally impaired and autistic - each having an extremely difficult time verbally expressing their wants, needs and feelings) to verbally discuss the meaning... that they may not see themselves... of their art?
- Should we expect the to verbalize the feeling projected through their art work?
- Do we need them to verbalize the feeling projected through their art work?
- How different are the answers to theses questions across different populations (ie more developed or verbal populations)
- Should the discussion of a client's art work and emotional status take place within the group - allowing other clients to comment on meanings, as well as the therapist or should the therapist and specific client discuss the meaning of the work privately?
In the end - does it do the client any good if the therapist is able to read into the artwork - but the client is not mentally capable of discussing it?
Phhheeewww - my mind is buzzing!
Art-ing about it :)
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Day 5 12/29/2009
After a day of answering my own questions and questioning my own answers, my answers were reinforced by the client at the Fancy Free Day Habitation Program. After Lauren made the announcement that we would be doing a regular group (as opposed to a production geared group), to close the year 2009 - with representations of wishes for the new year, I was presented with a beautiful gift, and thanks for joining the group. I was given a glass vase that was painted with flowers and a hand made card signed by the clients! I was so touched that the group appreciated my presence and participation. It showed me that the group appreciated art therapy and the role of the therapist as well!
Our group went well. There were three new faces and I was able to talk to each, having an opportunity to brainstorm with a client as to what he would wish for in the new year. He informed me that he wanted to be with his family to celebrate and proceeded to ask me how to write out his wish. I prompted the client to draw his wish, and he asked how. I suggested drawing the members of his family and himself celebrating as he imagined they would. The client was was able to do this well but was still insistent on using text. He asked me how to spell 'Celebrate' and how to write '2010', and waited with is marker poised to write. I took a crayon and wrote the words/numbers - the client was able to write the words without further assistance.
Another client was needy (for lack of a better word) - but not pushy. This client was writing "Happy New Years 2010" in bubble letters. He took nearly the entire session to draw out the words in pencil, and then 2o minutes (+/-) to color the words in. The client got stumped on some letters and I assisted by drawing an example. I had to ask the client to put down his pencil and pay attention to what I was doing, and not his own drawing - because he has asked me to help him with the same letter several times, after I had showed him the example a few times already.
I can see that this client has some perfectionist qualities that are apparent in the making process. He judges his won work - often erasing in order to try again. I think this is a positive quality, but may also hinder him in the making process - I feel it would be more beneficial for the client to allow looseness and freedom to enter his work - than to restrict it with his need for perfection.
{If the client gets stuck on one aspect, the concept of the rest o the work is sacrificed - or is it that the concept won't come through for the client without adhering to his own notions of perfection? }
I am not sure if it was just because the activities had been centered around holiday themes, but it seems that the clients feed off of each other's creations - feed off is not the right term - but repeat or reproduce. The group become static in that respect. While the clients are still greatly enjoying themselves there is less individual expression - it is almost as if they already know the cue of the holidays - the media or advertisements and gravitate towards representing that universal image as opposed to a want / need / thought / or feeling from within themselves.
It will be interesting to see with this group especially how we poise that groups whether in terms of production or just group - with no holiday connection.
Art-ing About it :}
Our group went well. There were three new faces and I was able to talk to each, having an opportunity to brainstorm with a client as to what he would wish for in the new year. He informed me that he wanted to be with his family to celebrate and proceeded to ask me how to write out his wish. I prompted the client to draw his wish, and he asked how. I suggested drawing the members of his family and himself celebrating as he imagined they would. The client was was able to do this well but was still insistent on using text. He asked me how to spell 'Celebrate' and how to write '2010', and waited with is marker poised to write. I took a crayon and wrote the words/numbers - the client was able to write the words without further assistance.
Another client was needy (for lack of a better word) - but not pushy. This client was writing "Happy New Years 2010" in bubble letters. He took nearly the entire session to draw out the words in pencil, and then 2o minutes (+/-) to color the words in. The client got stumped on some letters and I assisted by drawing an example. I had to ask the client to put down his pencil and pay attention to what I was doing, and not his own drawing - because he has asked me to help him with the same letter several times, after I had showed him the example a few times already.
I can see that this client has some perfectionist qualities that are apparent in the making process. He judges his won work - often erasing in order to try again. I think this is a positive quality, but may also hinder him in the making process - I feel it would be more beneficial for the client to allow looseness and freedom to enter his work - than to restrict it with his need for perfection.
{If the client gets stuck on one aspect, the concept of the rest o the work is sacrificed - or is it that the concept won't come through for the client without adhering to his own notions of perfection? }
I am not sure if it was just because the activities had been centered around holiday themes, but it seems that the clients feed off of each other's creations - feed off is not the right term - but repeat or reproduce. The group become static in that respect. While the clients are still greatly enjoying themselves there is less individual expression - it is almost as if they already know the cue of the holidays - the media or advertisements and gravitate towards representing that universal image as opposed to a want / need / thought / or feeling from within themselves.
It will be interesting to see with this group especially how we poise that groups whether in terms of production or just group - with no holiday connection.
Art-ing About it :}
Day 4 12/28/2009
After my first experience with the Helping Hands Respite program ( which is the art therapy group with autistic children), I was wondering how Monday would go - beginning with this session instead of ending with it. I was not nervous but was preparing myself for mixed emotions once again.
The program began without a hitch. The children came into the art room with their staff and quietly sat down. Lauren, the art therapist I am working under, had based the days activity around what the kids would be doing that day - the main focus being on their going to the library for story telling. For that reason we created books in which the children could create stories though drawing.
Together we bound the books, encouraging the children t participate in the process, we guided them to punch down on the hole puncher, and to pull the ribbon through the holes to bind the book. In the two sessions we had I worked with two different boys closely. The first (Client A) had very impaired motor activity, he was also uninterested in our activity and spent most of the session looking around and slowly standing up - reaching for something else. Client A only helped in the book making process when his staff or myself actually took his hand and attempted to push down the puncher or pull the string. He drew very few drawings in the book, each were rather sparse [in terms of area covered, line weight and color variation]
The second boy I worked with (Client B) also needed to be physically guided to help with the book making process - but had more control over his motor functions than Client A had - our guidance was more of a reminder to him of what our activity was - a way of keeping his attention on the book making activity. After guiding the string through the first set of holes and having Client B pull the ribbon through, he attempted to lace the second string with my instruction regarding which side to start on, and which hole to go into. The client was able to put the string through the hole of the front cover, and attempted to lace it through the back cover, but twice disregarded the blank pages between them. In the end I laced the strings and the consumer pulled the laces.
Client B was able to create several drawings in his book, however there was a time lapse between each drawing - or even the completion of one, in which the consumer sat, and looked at the drawing, or the crayons, or what was going on around him, I prompted him to continue drawings, and after considering for some time he chose a crayon and began again. It seemed as if he applied great thought as to what color to choose.
As I looked around I watched the faces of the children and saw Concentration, and happiness. The activity brought them joy, the process was enjoyable and satisfying. The children would look to their staff or Lauren and myself, and point to their drawings with pride!
This was a very powerful and important realization for me. I have been wondering - because I have only been volunteering for 4 days and will be here no longer than a month - that I do not/will not see what progress has been made or will be made with all the clients. It has worried me and the question of whether I am doing anything to help the clients has crossed my mind. The question of whether Art Therapy is doing anything to help the clients - who will most likely never develop to the "normal" stages despite all their therapies has crossed my mind. The last question was one I could answer immediately, and the question it again. The answer came first as 'Yes of course it helps' - and the questions following were - Are you sure? How can you tell? Is it enough?
I don't have an answer - or at least a complete answer to all the questions - but seeing the pride in the faces of these children, knowing that they felt accomplished in their own way was a reinforcement of my belief that "art-ing" is self healing. It may not be enough... but it is something - and it is something strong!
And so the question mark has shrunk some, and my eyes opened more to see and learn the power of art therapy.
Art-ing about it ;)
Images 1 - 3: Series - Towards Answers
The program began without a hitch. The children came into the art room with their staff and quietly sat down. Lauren, the art therapist I am working under, had based the days activity around what the kids would be doing that day - the main focus being on their going to the library for story telling. For that reason we created books in which the children could create stories though drawing.
Together we bound the books, encouraging the children t participate in the process, we guided them to punch down on the hole puncher, and to pull the ribbon through the holes to bind the book. In the two sessions we had I worked with two different boys closely. The first (Client A) had very impaired motor activity, he was also uninterested in our activity and spent most of the session looking around and slowly standing up - reaching for something else. Client A only helped in the book making process when his staff or myself actually took his hand and attempted to push down the puncher or pull the string. He drew very few drawings in the book, each were rather sparse [in terms of area covered, line weight and color variation]
The second boy I worked with (Client B) also needed to be physically guided to help with the book making process - but had more control over his motor functions than Client A had - our guidance was more of a reminder to him of what our activity was - a way of keeping his attention on the book making activity. After guiding the string through the first set of holes and having Client B pull the ribbon through, he attempted to lace the second string with my instruction regarding which side to start on, and which hole to go into. The client was able to put the string through the hole of the front cover, and attempted to lace it through the back cover, but twice disregarded the blank pages between them. In the end I laced the strings and the consumer pulled the laces.
Client B was able to create several drawings in his book, however there was a time lapse between each drawing - or even the completion of one, in which the consumer sat, and looked at the drawing, or the crayons, or what was going on around him, I prompted him to continue drawings, and after considering for some time he chose a crayon and began again. It seemed as if he applied great thought as to what color to choose.
As I looked around I watched the faces of the children and saw Concentration, and happiness. The activity brought them joy, the process was enjoyable and satisfying. The children would look to their staff or Lauren and myself, and point to their drawings with pride!
This was a very powerful and important realization for me. I have been wondering - because I have only been volunteering for 4 days and will be here no longer than a month - that I do not/will not see what progress has been made or will be made with all the clients. It has worried me and the question of whether I am doing anything to help the clients has crossed my mind. The question of whether Art Therapy is doing anything to help the clients - who will most likely never develop to the "normal" stages despite all their therapies has crossed my mind. The last question was one I could answer immediately, and the question it again. The answer came first as 'Yes of course it helps' - and the questions following were - Are you sure? How can you tell? Is it enough?
I don't have an answer - or at least a complete answer to all the questions - but seeing the pride in the faces of these children, knowing that they felt accomplished in their own way was a reinforcement of my belief that "art-ing" is self healing. It may not be enough... but it is something - and it is something strong!
And so the question mark has shrunk some, and my eyes opened more to see and learn the power of art therapy.
Art-ing about it ;)
Images 1 - 3: Series - Towards Answers
Day 3 (Session II) 12/23/2009
My first experience with Autism was with children. My only background regarding autism before today comes from what I have read in psychology textbooks, articles regarding art therapy and autism, and video case studies presented in psychology lectures.
I was warned that I would possibly see and experience things I had never before. While I think my limited background knowledge of autism, and some brief but important information that Lauren relayed to me regarding the children I would meet, did a great deal to prepare me for what I would experience on Wednesday 12/23/2009
Lauren explained that some sessions run quite smoothly, without major outbursts, and others are more chaotic, like the session we had that afternoon. We had a group of four, and for confidentiality purposes I will refer to them as Client 1, Client 2, etc. Each had a different energy and mood - and for the most part each client's individual personality affected their peer's. For example, male Client 2 affected female Client 4 adversely. Client 2 was highly energetic, and emitted and extremely loud noise, that I can describe only as falling between a Screech and a howl. He uses this sound to communicate his emotional state, and it varies in tone, volume and speed depending on whether it is happy, sad, mad confused, etc. Client 4 is a mostly non-verbal child. She communicates with a few key words combined with high-pitched sing-song gibberish. When Client 2 became agitated, and reacted in the extreme [this particular client hits himself, as well as others if they are in his range], hitting himself and screech/howling quite loudly, Client 4 became upset, and began crying, interrupted only by a high-pitch hum. Client 4 had to be removed by her one-on-one staff to avoid an outburst from her as well. Client 2 was instructed to calm down, and had to gain control of himself - this was clearly a struggle for the client. I watched, as he tried to take part n deep breathing, and tried to smile and laugh. Client 2 tried to put his hand down on the table, and tried to keep them there. This went on for about 3 minutes until he was able to regain control of himself.
Client 1 was happy to begin art therapy, and seemed to be quite accustomed to the routine. Client 3, quietly sat down and waited - very much in his own world. Client 4 required some coaxing, and constant surveillance in case her mood went sour (during our half hour session she became very emotional and tearful, but could quickly revert to a stable or jovial mood within seconds with the help of her staff. If Client 4 was given something to flip in the air, she began to laugh. Client 2 went through a handful of emotions in the short half hour, all of which were extreme. He was at first impatient to begin, reaching for materials and was having a difficult time being seated. He was very happy to begin the New Assignment.
[Lauren has begun to modify the circle assignment, creating with the clients a more 3 dimensional border, as apposed to the drawn circle she has been working with for some time. In this case we were using Styrofoam peanuts to glue around the drawn circle - followed by painting them.]
I was working closely with Client 2. Together - but mostly with me guiding his hand - we made a circular glue marker, and the client began to glue the peanuts down. We had left a gap in the circle, and it was not until he had very neatly glued all he peanuts he could, that he expressed a need for more glue. Having glued all the peanuts down he was ready to paint. I asked what color paint he would like and he requested green, which I mixed for him. Alex painted only about a quarter of the peanuts, focusing mostly on the bottom of the circle and moving up towards the left side. He painted a bit on the inside of the circle.
Once client 2 was decidedly finished, he could not be prompted to do anymore art - and once again became quite impatient. He requested/demanded to have computer time. He was told by his staff he would not be able to use the computer until 4:20 when art therapy had finished. With this the client became clearly agitated - continually asking to use the computer and screech/howling. It was at this point that Client 2 had the physical outburst that involved hitting himself repeatedly and struggling to calm himself that I have described above. Our session ended when Client 2 was able to compose himself, and smiling he said to his staff "Ready", and they left the room.
Reflecting:
Throughout the session I felt sort of numb to the condition of the children - not unfeeling - but not pitying, not shocked, not bothered. I suppose if anything I was really quite interested. Each personality and set of reactions was so different; as well as each client's way of working - speed, concentration, method and reaction to it.
I wasn't expecting this, but was also not necessarily, not expecting this..
It was not until driving home that I began experiencing any of it. My concentration was not as sharp as it should have been on the highway. I could only feel sorry that these kids were affected in this way... and may have little room for improvement .
I was unable to deal with any extra stimulus - I had to turn off the radio for half the ride. I noticed then that I was actually quite tense. My muscles were scrunched up in my neck and shoulders, and I gripped the steering wheel uncharacteristically tight. Still I was - and am unsure how to express my reaction to the session in words - It was so spread out between numbness, interest, anxiety, sympathy, and excitement. Despite all the action - the kids seemed to love what they were doing
I was hoping that I would learn more about how I was feeling though my drawings - and I did! After creating the drawings below I wrote:
I felt like a radio frequency that was picking up more than one station - between the different songs and static I couldn't tell what was on.
Art-ing about it :0
Images 1-3: Shades of Gray
Images 4-5: Untitled
I was warned that I would possibly see and experience things I had never before. While I think my limited background knowledge of autism, and some brief but important information that Lauren relayed to me regarding the children I would meet, did a great deal to prepare me for what I would experience on Wednesday 12/23/2009
Lauren explained that some sessions run quite smoothly, without major outbursts, and others are more chaotic, like the session we had that afternoon. We had a group of four, and for confidentiality purposes I will refer to them as Client 1, Client 2, etc. Each had a different energy and mood - and for the most part each client's individual personality affected their peer's. For example, male Client 2 affected female Client 4 adversely. Client 2 was highly energetic, and emitted and extremely loud noise, that I can describe only as falling between a Screech and a howl. He uses this sound to communicate his emotional state, and it varies in tone, volume and speed depending on whether it is happy, sad, mad confused, etc. Client 4 is a mostly non-verbal child. She communicates with a few key words combined with high-pitched sing-song gibberish. When Client 2 became agitated, and reacted in the extreme [this particular client hits himself, as well as others if they are in his range], hitting himself and screech/howling quite loudly, Client 4 became upset, and began crying, interrupted only by a high-pitch hum. Client 4 had to be removed by her one-on-one staff to avoid an outburst from her as well. Client 2 was instructed to calm down, and had to gain control of himself - this was clearly a struggle for the client. I watched, as he tried to take part n deep breathing, and tried to smile and laugh. Client 2 tried to put his hand down on the table, and tried to keep them there. This went on for about 3 minutes until he was able to regain control of himself.
Client 1 was happy to begin art therapy, and seemed to be quite accustomed to the routine. Client 3, quietly sat down and waited - very much in his own world. Client 4 required some coaxing, and constant surveillance in case her mood went sour (during our half hour session she became very emotional and tearful, but could quickly revert to a stable or jovial mood within seconds with the help of her staff. If Client 4 was given something to flip in the air, she began to laugh. Client 2 went through a handful of emotions in the short half hour, all of which were extreme. He was at first impatient to begin, reaching for materials and was having a difficult time being seated. He was very happy to begin the New Assignment.
[Lauren has begun to modify the circle assignment, creating with the clients a more 3 dimensional border, as apposed to the drawn circle she has been working with for some time. In this case we were using Styrofoam peanuts to glue around the drawn circle - followed by painting them.]
I was working closely with Client 2. Together - but mostly with me guiding his hand - we made a circular glue marker, and the client began to glue the peanuts down. We had left a gap in the circle, and it was not until he had very neatly glued all he peanuts he could, that he expressed a need for more glue. Having glued all the peanuts down he was ready to paint. I asked what color paint he would like and he requested green, which I mixed for him. Alex painted only about a quarter of the peanuts, focusing mostly on the bottom of the circle and moving up towards the left side. He painted a bit on the inside of the circle.
Once client 2 was decidedly finished, he could not be prompted to do anymore art - and once again became quite impatient. He requested/demanded to have computer time. He was told by his staff he would not be able to use the computer until 4:20 when art therapy had finished. With this the client became clearly agitated - continually asking to use the computer and screech/howling. It was at this point that Client 2 had the physical outburst that involved hitting himself repeatedly and struggling to calm himself that I have described above. Our session ended when Client 2 was able to compose himself, and smiling he said to his staff "Ready", and they left the room.
Reflecting:
Throughout the session I felt sort of numb to the condition of the children - not unfeeling - but not pitying, not shocked, not bothered. I suppose if anything I was really quite interested. Each personality and set of reactions was so different; as well as each client's way of working - speed, concentration, method and reaction to it.
I wasn't expecting this, but was also not necessarily, not expecting this..
It was not until driving home that I began experiencing any of it. My concentration was not as sharp as it should have been on the highway. I could only feel sorry that these kids were affected in this way... and may have little room for improvement .
I was unable to deal with any extra stimulus - I had to turn off the radio for half the ride. I noticed then that I was actually quite tense. My muscles were scrunched up in my neck and shoulders, and I gripped the steering wheel uncharacteristically tight. Still I was - and am unsure how to express my reaction to the session in words - It was so spread out between numbness, interest, anxiety, sympathy, and excitement. Despite all the action - the kids seemed to love what they were doing
I was hoping that I would learn more about how I was feeling though my drawings - and I did! After creating the drawings below I wrote:
I felt like a radio frequency that was picking up more than one station - between the different songs and static I couldn't tell what was on.
Art-ing about it :0
Images 1-3: Shades of Gray
Images 4-5: Untitled
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